Owners of sex dolls are less prone to sexual aggression, but also ...

seagull · Post by **seagull** » Thu May 18, 2023 2:32 am

Craig A. Harper, Rebecca Lievesley & Katie Wanless
Pages 190-205 | Published online: 15 Feb 2022

The paper begins with the disclaimer:
At the root of these calls is the implicit (and often explicit) assumption that sex doll ownership contributes to increases in negative social attitudes toward women, and sexual offense risk among doll owners. However, there are yet to be any empirical examinations of these claims.

Rock13 is on the money with "if you've met one doll lifestyler then you've met one doll lifestyler.", we're all different.
As for the concept of aggression that also, broadly speaking, varies from society to society as well as within societal groups

Stewie studmuffin · Post by **Stewie studmuffin** » Thu May 18, 2023 3:00 am

In my case my dolls have have left me less interested than ever in sex with carbon based women.
In fact, I remember seeing an ad on Pornhub a while back asking "Are you willing to travel 5 miles for a blowjob?" and my first thought was "Sounds like too much trouble."

Papasmurf1142 · Post by **Papasmurf1142** » Thu May 18, 2023 3:53 am

Sexual self-esteem??? That’s a thing?? I seriously thought self-esteem was just an all-encompassing personality trait yet here we are. Why can’t ppl just enjoy something without any judgement? I’d like to fuck a perfect 10 someday.. being married at 52 years old removes that from a realm of possibility to a complete fairytale (many apologies to the fae folk).. they don’t often include enough voices in the doll community for these studies only to end up making conclusions such as this that will only land in the pages of some cosmopolitan magazine.. it’s whatever..

Tyr · Post by **Tyr** » Thu May 18, 2023 6:14 am

Fortunately I don't care wether my owning a doll has an alleged effect on those who can't be criticised.

Tyr

Stewie studmuffin · Post by **Stewie studmuffin** » Thu May 18, 2023 6:11 pm

In regards to the sexual self-esteem thing, the only thing that really destroyed my self-esteem was when I was trying to date years ago. There is nothing more soul crushing than sitting at a computer for hours on end sending message after message only to be ignored.

But now that I have given up and devote my emotional energy entirely to my dolls I feel much better and my self-esteemed is greatly improved in the process.

Post by **Rock13** » Thu May 18, 2023 7:02 pm

Stewie studmuffin wrote: ↑Thu May 18, 2023 6:11 pm In regards to the sexual self-esteem thing, the only thing that really destroyed my self-esteem was when I was trying to date years ago. There is nothing more soul crushing than sitting at a computer for hours on end sending message after message only to be ignored.

But now that I have given up and devote my emotional energy entirely to my dolls I feel much better and my self-esteemed is greatly improved in the process.

I don't even know what "sexual self esteem" is. If TikTok is any indication, there are an awful lot of people out there who think they're all that when they're actually not. Is it based on how many orgasms you can elicit from a partner? On whether you can keep it up and running until dawn? I've never attempted to date online, nor through personals newspaper ads back in the day. I met everyone I've ever slept with in the course of daily, personal encounters. Yeah, when I was young I was the guy who could pick up women at a taco truck, or the school library, or after PE class, or in a work situation that would've been scandalous should it come to light. Not everyone I slept with seemed eager for a repeat encounter, perhaps they didn't have a good time. Those who were entusiastic and invited followups did boost my sense of "sexual self esteem" if there's even such a thing. Sometimes, it's because although it was indeed a good time they didn't want to get further involved for totally unrelated reasons. Sometimes it was because they were cheating and just sport fucked me when they thought they could get away with it. Honestly, it got to the point where "I have a boyfriend" or "I'm married" seemed like code for "if you wanna fuck me, do it now lest you miss the moment". Some of them moved in with me, others married me. People are complicated, dolls are simple. At this point in my life and for the foreseeable future, simple is good.

Stewie studmuffin · Post by **Stewie studmuffin** » Sat May 20, 2023 8:16 pm

Rock13 wrote: ↑Thu May 18, 2023 7:02 pm I don't even know what "sexual self esteem" is. If TikTok is any indication, there are an awful lot of people out there who think they're all that when they're actually not. Is it based on how many orgasms you can elicit from a partner? On whether you can keep it up and running until dawn? I've never attempted to date online, nor through personals newspaper ads back in the day. I met everyone I've ever slept with in the course of daily, personal encounters. Yeah, when I was young I was the guy who could pick up women at a taco truck, or the school library, or after PE class, or in a work situation that would've been scandalous should it come to light. Not everyone I slept with seemed eager for a repeat encounter, perhaps they didn't have a good time. Those who were entusiastic and invited followups did boost my sense of "sexual self esteem" if there's even such a thing. Sometimes, it's because although it was indeed a good time they didn't want to get further involved for totally unrelated reasons. Sometimes it was because they were cheating and just sport fucked me when they thought they could get away with it. Honestly, it got to the point where "I have a boyfriend" or "I'm married" seemed like code for "if you wanna fuck me, do it now lest you miss the moment". Some of them moved in with me, others married me. People are complicated, dolls are simple. At this point in my life and for the foreseeable future, simple is good.

My problem is that I have always been extremely shy and socially awkward so whenever I tried to approach a woman in person, it usually ended in disaster. Which of course completely wrecked what little self esteem I had in the process.

After trying and failing enough times I finally decided that I would have to stick with alternative methods. I had some success with the newspaper personals back in the 90s as far as making contact with women was concerned. But nothing ever worked out in the long run. Internet dating wasn't really all that bad when it was first getting started and in the early 2000s. It seems to have begun deteriorating as it's popularity grew and things really went to crap after Tinder became a thing in 2012. I finally gave up on it altogether in 2013 as the constant rejections were making me feel like the biggest loser ever.

As for "sexual self esteem", I have never heard of that either. I can only assume that it refers to how a man feels about himself based on how he can rock a woman's world in the bedroom. In which case I'm out of luck for sure.

I say this because it's my contention that if a man is really making a woman's toes curl then she won't be so quick to move on to the next guy. The last two woman with whom I was involved definitely didn't give me much confidence in my performance. The first one admitted to having been with over 50 guys so I would assume that she liked sex. But anytime I tried to get her to do anything it was like pulling teeth. And even when she did agree to put out, she was rushing me to "Hurry up and get it over with." :drinking:

The next one was an old crazy cat lady who lived in a small apartment and had cats all over the place. She soon moved to a house out in the country so that she would have plenty of room for her furry friends but she never let me know where her new place was. Although she still wanted me to go out with her to restaurants and stuff so that I could spend my money on her but she didn't want me to come to her place because I "might want to have sex." She actually told me that. So basically I was supposed to take her out and spend money on her with nothing in return. Sounds like quite a deal.

I just want to add that I did have sex with her before she moved away. So that's why I can't help but think that after she sampled the merchandise she found it unremarkable. I will admit that I'm no Chad Thunderpenis but all those cats running and jumping all over the place didn't exactly help my performance. They were even jumping on the bed when I was trying to work my magic. In fact, when I rolled off of her after banging the snot out of her for five whole seconds, things got even more interesting. I felt something on the tip of my little Vienna sausage and I was like "What tha............" I looked to see what it was and one of those damn cats had touched it with his nose.

This was his reaction after he got a whiff of it. :haha4:

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Luiskjr · Post by **Luiskjr** » Sat May 20, 2023 8:31 pm

What happens is...
Surveyors and their backing institutions want to LEARN about dolls. The survey is because THEY (not us) know nothing and want to dig and understand the doll world and users.

So they make this survey for them, but because its done by them... its like if heterossexual conservative doctors or psychiatrists start writing about the reasons of being gay and what goes on in their mind...

they are bound to conclude gays have some mental deviation... and they did on surveys in this area one hundred years ago

Kandicaine · Post by **Kandicaine** » Sat May 20, 2023 8:57 pm

but also have lower sexual self-esteem

Cap. I fuck like a porn star

Papasmurf1142 · Post by **Papasmurf1142** » Sat May 20, 2023 10:10 pm

This might be off topic, but somehow my doll has managed to get me off pornography .. I haven’t seen a single clip in the past few months..I’ve even been taking better care of myself.. weird, right?

Stewie studmuffin · Post by **Stewie studmuffin** » Sat May 20, 2023 10:43 pm

Papasmurf1142 wrote: ↑Sat May 20, 2023 10:10 pm This might be off topic, but somehow my doll has managed to get me off pornography .. I haven’t seen a single clip in the past few months..I’ve even been taking better care of myself.. weird, right?

I have noticed this as well. The only time that I find myself looking at porn is when I am bored and don't have anything else to do. (Which is extremely rare these days) The last few times that I have looked at a porn site was when someone sent me a link to something.
While I still do the deed with my main doll every few days, I'm definitely not obsessed with sex like I was years ago.
So my dolls have definitely cured me of that.

Then again, it could just be old age sneaking up on me. :drinking:

SimonSays7 · Post by **SimonSays7** » Sat May 20, 2023 10:49 pm

These conclusions might have some merit, who knows, or it's a bias in the research, but even if it's true, so what?

I see lots of folks on here with all kinds of swagger and defensiveness about relationships, that's often a sign of insecurity. But that's not a crime. Neither is not being able to deal with relationships and taking pleasure in a doll.

To each their own. Even if having a doll was a sign that I have "lower sexual self-esteem" than some average, I don't care. Like "high sexual self-esteem" matters in life so much. I'm sure it's sexy sometimes, to some people. But life is complex. I'm good with having a doll. I work on my human relationships too. But it's way easier to fuck dolls than humans. People are complicated, dolls are not.

Luiskjr · Post by **Luiskjr** » Sun May 21, 2023 1:04 am

SimonSays7 wrote: ↑Sat May 20, 2023 10:49 pm These conclusions might have some merit, who knows, or it's a bias in the research, but even if it's true, so what?

I see lots of folks on here with all kinds of swagger and defensiveness about relationships, that's often a sign of insecurity. But that's not a crime. Neither is not being able to deal with relationships and taking pleasure in a doll.

To each their own. Even if having a doll was a sign that I have "lower sexual self-esteem" than some average, I don't care. Like "high sexual self-esteem" matters in life so much. I'm sure it's sexy sometimes, to some people. But life is complex. I'm good with having a doll. I work on my human relationships too. But it's way easier to fuck dolls than humans. People are complicated, dolls are not.

You are right, many users have relationship problems of some sort or want to avoid them altogether.

But its not a right answer for a reason people choose dolls, its a right answer for THEM, desperate wanting to conclude the decision to live with dolls is due to a fault in personality.

Its the fist step to ban dolls and suggest users should get medical treatment.

Yes, we have low self-esteem in the current world situation. Its a result of how society has evolved. Like climate change.

We don't want to run careers or invest in social efforts to implore some female to give us her pussy.

We just don't like the pussies as they come today. Old to some, stressful to others. Ugly or fat, bringing kids from previous relations, requiring hard work to maintain status and appearance, conditions and financial risks, and above all... the lack of romance... people just don't fall in love anymore in many cases, its just convenience.

We haven't got self-esteem to pursue our ideal woman. True. Maybe our standards are too high.

The reasons for having self-esteem are the important answer. Just self-esteem alone is a vague conclusion that suggests poor character.

All heterosexual preferences are based in low self-esteem for traditional relations. Bdsm, Sugar Daddy, prostitution clients to name a few, you can argue Bachelors that decide not to marry can be in the group too.

Porn users. Many porn consumers may have low self esteem. But why?
Should we prohibit porn? At least dolls are a level up from porn. Ban porn and promote more dolls.

Dolls are a decision to step aside from real women, either temporary or permanently.

In contrast, empowered women made the same decision, choosing a silicone dildo and another female, bisexual in minutes. As changing a t-shirt.

Why don't surveyors say feminists have low self esteem to assume their female nature and find a proper male partner? Cause they don't. They just prefer not to be with men. Its a choice in a current world social gender situation that makes them feel unsatisfied