I need to VENT

OldLonely · Post by **OldLonely** » Thu Jun 30, 2022 9:01 am

I'm not mentioning anyone by name, but after being a member here for a very short time I must explain what I have experienced in this forum. Truthfully, I belong to MANY different discussion sites about many topics, and I can safely say that I have NEVER seen so many rude and inconsiderate members than right here.

Example: Attempting to get gallery space has been a bust. I've tried repeatedly, sending in the request form, even using the PM feature to the moderators. NOTHING. Not one response. So, I join Flickr and upload my images.

So, I post a doll for sale. A brand new, perfectly good, unused doll, with pics and all data posted. I get some PMs about the doll, and even a few that tell me they WANT the doll. What happens? NOTHING. No follow-ups, no "I've changed my mind" , no "I've found another one", no " I can't afford the cost right now", NOTHING. Just silence, which leaves me wondering if the last message I sent actually went through, or was it read and ignored? Or, did the system mess up and the message is sitting in limbo? No, no responses, just silence.

Has anyone here heard of common courtesy? Is it unheard of to actually tell someone you've changed your mind, or found a different item? I still have a handful of messages in my outbox waiting to be read. I still have a TON of messages that were sent, read, and ignored. You know, common courtesy goes a long way when dealing with people. How about just being honest? If you don't want the item you were just conversing about, SAY SO. Stop ignoring people and leaving them hanging, not knowing if you want it or not.

And, moderators and admins? How about answering your requests and PMs as well? I 've requested gallery space at least 5 or 6 times. I got nuttin. Not a " okay, I'll set you up". Not a "sorry for taking so long, lets get it done". Not even a "kiss my ass"!

Alright, I'm finished. I know this probably will have no effect, but I had to get it off my chest. I was raised to be polite and tell people the truth. Honesty is the best policy and I believe that. Communication is the key.

AVNDoll · Post by **AVNDoll** » Thu Jun 30, 2022 1:01 pm

Sorry to hear about your experiences. If it helps, I'm sure plenty of people have experienced what you have. I know I have a few times, not just on this forum but on others and in real life as well.

I am a member of a wide variety of forums as well, and I can tell you there are much ruder forums than this. Not to mention any specifically, but have you been on any popular meme sharing, body building, motorcycle, or financial investment forums/groups? Those guys don't hold anything back and are quite opinionated.

There are tons of rude and annoying liars out there. Personally, I don't think many of those people are here. Your experiences might be skewed by a small sample size or because of your frame of reference.

I am also used to selling a lot of items online, via eBay, Amazon, and other marketplace platforms. Something you just get used to is how people inquire or make offers or literally buy the actual item only to disappear and lapse on payment or follow up.

It is a thing that happens, people have been doing it, and I don't think they'll stop under the guise of common courtesy. I don't agree with it but it is an inevitable consequence of the disconnect in online sales.

I think the traffic on this forum is slower than you'd like, as it usually takes me a few days to get a reply from the less active members. The active ones respond in a day or less.

It took me 3 days to get my album approved. Turns out I didn't even need to use it, and attaching photos directly to the post in this forum works better. I think the album delay can be chalked up to the fact that there aren't many moderators for that section, and it being a different section the moderators for this forum have no influence on it. People also have lives and responsibilities, so maybe approving album accounts manually just wasn't in the cards for them that week.

There could be plenty of reasons for the other things as well. Notably, I sent a few messages that were received as read, but no replies. When following up, one of those members explained that he read the PM and simply forgot to respond for 3 days. He finally responded and apologized when I messaged a politely worded follow up. I'm still trying to continue a negotiation with him. I realized--albeit slowly--he is responding when he has time or energy.

Others have simply ignored the follow up. To this I have to chalk it up to people having their own preferences. As you and I prefer to be direct and honest, there are people who lean toward indirectness. We lean in, they lean out. Maybe they just find it easier to deny by ignoring than by reaching out. If this is the case, I believe we must excuse their preferences rather than dictate how 'considerate to us' they should be.

Another case, I sent a PM to a member who had a full inbox, PM disappeared in the system and nobody read it. I don't know the fix for this, I guess they'd have to clean out their inbox.

Let me say this, even the post office doesn't always get the mail right!

Anyway sometimes you just get rude people. The same can be said for our physical society. I'm not making any excuses for them but you gotta let it roll off you.

You'll get the result you want if you keep at it.

Hope you feel better about all this.

Post by **Nescio50** » Thu Jun 30, 2022 1:16 pm

I don't know details of what happened. If you have a question for TDF Management, please do send me a PM, or email us at support@dollforum.com. We usually answer your question within 24 hours.

About all at staff, please know that all of us are volunteers. TDF is a forum for doll enthusiast, run by doll enthusiasts. Not all staff members are available 24/7, many of us do have their job or other obligations. Some may be on a trip or vacation. Therefore, if it is important, best is to send an email to our support address.

Fantastic Plastic · Post by **Fantastic Plastic** » Thu Jun 30, 2022 1:33 pm

Hey Nescio, if you want to hear a vent, PM me! I dare you!

Ztar073 · Post by **Ztar073** » Thu Jun 30, 2022 1:35 pm

Stop it you rude bastards

OldLonely · Post by **OldLonely** » Thu Jun 30, 2022 2:19 pm

Most is well and good. Issues have been rectified, except for the members who fail to respond with at least an acknowledgement that have received your message. Otherwise. It's all okay.

Thank you